Plan ahead and organize your life
Planning ahead has been so key for me in changing my life and how I manage it. I was floating through life for so long, unorganized and stressed with no idea how to manage it all. As soon as I got myself organized in my life as well as mentally organized so much changed for me! Some people (my past self included) just do not realize how much EASIER life is when you plan ahead. I thought I was going to be tied down and boring if I was planning and scheduling everything but damn was I wrong!
Some people theorize that every day we all wake up with a certain amount of cognitive ability. We all have a certain amount of willpower and decision making abilities and these are not infinite resources in our day. Which makes perfect sense to me …this is why, at the end of the day, it is so much harder to stick to new habits or tell our kids no – we just don’t have enough of that resource left! But when you plan ahead, you’ve already made the decision. So you can save that precious resource for other decisions and things that require will power and decision making in your day.
Some others theorize that will power, decision making and memory (all cognitive functions of the pre-frontal cortex) are like a muscle, you have to use them for them to become stronger. This makes a lot of sense too – that’s how habits work! The more you do something, the deeper and more saturated that neural pathway in your brain will be. Every time we do something we cement it just a tiny bit more into ourselves. Try to plan and automate as many of your habits as you can – make them so routine that you don’t even have to think about them anymore – like brushing your teeth or drinking your coffee in the morning. When you automate your habits, you create space for other decisions and life decisions that require will power. You don’t have to decide or make yourself do the things that are already cemented in your brain- you just do them. Like driving to work – when you’ve done something for a long time, you don’t even have to think about it. Automate as many habits and things in your life as you can (like using automatic bill pay or putting birthdays in your phone calendar) so you have the time, mental space and will power to do the important things in your life.
Planning ahead can be tangible or intangible. It may include writing or typing your plans into a calendar or planning what you will wear the next day (tangible) or it may be planning out how you will respond to a person or planning when you will leave an event (intangible.)
For a tangible way to plan use a written or typed schedule to help you stay organized. Pick a day to plan your week. I use Sunday afternoons because it gives me plenty of time and its usually a day I don’t have much going on. But you can pick any day that works for you. Find a quiet spot and take 10 minutes or an hour – whatever you need and can fit in -but try to give yourself enough time to truly plan and organize your week. Use a notebook, calendar or your phone. Write down a list of everything you have to do that week – doctors appointments, laundry, dinner dates, kids activities, work stuff, down time, self care routines, even new habits that you are trying to pick up – put it all down, don’t leave anything out. Once you have it all written down, pick the day, what time and where you will do each thing and write it/ type it into your calendar. Schedule it all out so you have the mental space to start out each day fresh and clear headed without the burden of having to figure out what your day will look like.
Try to plan to do your most important things in the first part of your day (like working out or meditating) when your willpower resource is most abundant. And set up a plan for the evenings when your willpower resource is waning (like having some seltzer you love in the house to replace that wine.) Be mindful of what you are using your precious resources on and plan things ahead of time (like that outfit for the next day or which day to do your laundry- including folding and putting away) so you aren’t distracted from your plan with small decisions and can have a full tank for the day ahead of you!
For some of the intangible plans, you can still use tangible ways to plan them. You will want to put some of these plans into your schedule. Sometimes you can use sticky/post it notes as reminders – stick some affirmations (internal sentences that give you self support) or behaviors you want to practice (picking your battles with a child) on your mirror where you will see it often. Maybe you might want to meditate more or make time to walk in nature – for this you could use an alarm on your phone as a gentle prompt.
We always have ideas in our heads of what we want to do, but when we plan it out and attach a time and place to it, we add clarity to our plans. If you plan to do something, but don’t label a time and place for it to happen, most of the time it won’t happen. We have a foggy understanding of the things we want to accomplish and do, but we don’t approach them with clarity. Plan each thing you want to do, plan the goals you want to accomplish and plan how you will change your habits with precision and transparency. Be super specific.
Planning ahead frees up so much mental space – especially when you have the plan written down and visible. When you already know what you are doing and what you have scheduled that leaves you space for spontaneity and day dreaming! Sounds crazy right? It isn’t. When you plan ahead, you don’t have to worry about making choices that are hard – this is so key when you are trying to get rid of a bad habit. When you already know what you are going to do during the times that were most triggering for you, you don’t have to make decisions in the moment. Your past self has already made the decision for you! If you are trying to give up something like alcohol or overeating, don’t be afraid to plan and schedule EVERYTHING. What will you have for breakfast? What will you do after work instead of the bar? What will you do in the evening if that is a triggering time for you? What will you do when you feel an urge or a craving? If you have an event coming up, plan what you are going to eat or drink. Plan what you will say if someone offers you a drink or something off your eating plan. Plan what time you will leave and practice (even write this on your sticky notes) what you will say if asked why. Having everything planned out and practiced is so key! When you don’t have to think of what to do or say in the moment, when you have already planned it for yourself, you don’t have to worry about sliding back into the bad habit or making the wrong choice!
Planning ahead and carrying through on these plans won’t only organize your life and mind but will also build trust within you. When you plan ahead of time, and you honor those plans, you learn to trust yourself. As time goes on and you have that trust and know that you will do what your past self asked of you, this will build confidence in yourself and your abilities. And you know when you make your plans that you can trust your future self to carry through and honor them.
Planning ahead and organizing your life may seem like it will make your life boring and lack spontaneity, but the opposite is true. Planning will create space in your life! It will open your mind up in so many surprising ways…. give it a try for a few weeks and see what you think!